A fair go for JB - Brisbane Times (blog)

Press Release

Like the mining industry, JB has had enough of the federal government’s obsession with taxing him, saying Canberra’s objective should now be to make JB be more internationally competitive. Especially at the duty free shop, where a few extra bucks wouldn’t go astray when he jets off to Montreal next month.

The Greens put forward a bill on Monday to close some loop hole in the mining tax that lets miners pay less, or something, but JB is worried is that in the general enthusiasm for closing loopholes the PM and Treasurer might lose sight of the very real threat to his business of a looming loophole shortage coming June 30.

“Enough is enough," JB said in a statement about “the continued obsession with increasing taxes on JB".

"We should be looking at how we can be internationally competitive for investment and jobs for the benefit of JB today and in the future, rather than how we can keep carving up his pie for a lot of hungry bludgers who aren’t JB and have never done anything for this country, or JB,” said JB.

The Greens deputy leader Adam Bandt said the Labor government's “rhetoric about sharing the opportunity of the boom is an empty slogan,” but JB, the chief spokesman for JB, said the only sharing opportunity Mr Bandt was interested in was the chance of sharing in some of JB’s hard earned. Probably because he had that holiday on the dole and had developed a taste for it.

The Opposition has vowed to ditch the super profits tax if elected to power in September, but only on the mining industry and not on JB, which a spokesman for JB described as very disappointing for JB. And since that spokesman was JB, you can rest assured he spoke the truth.

Threatening to campaign against both the Government and the Opposition in the upcoming poll, JB said that he enjoyed the support of millions of ordinary hard working Australians, especially the bit where he drifted around his pool in a loophole shaped rubber tube kept afloat by the very large tax bills they paid to ensure that he didn’t.

Spokesmen for the mining industry were last seen edging towards the door.